Hunting is so easy. I really don’t know why hunters make such a big deal out of it and spend so much time on it. Seems incredibly simple to me. Let me explain…Jeremy is a hunter, specifically a deer hunter. He’s all into it. He washes with No Scent soap and wears camo and gets up at 4:30 in the morning to go sit in the cold, all by himself without talking or moving, to watch the sunrise and the squirrels chatter. And then he comes in and warms up and goes out again for sunset. Apparently deer are nocturnal animals, so the best time to hunt is sunrise and sunset. Whatever.
Last weekend we went up to my parents’ place. Jonas and Shaina (BIL and SIL) went with us, so Jeremy and Jonas could bow hunt. They went Saturday morning, Saturday evening and again Sunday evening. Didn’t come home with any deer. So Sunday afternoon we drove down to the river (near where they hunt) to do some target shooting. We spent about an hour and a half shooting – and we had plenty of different guns down there, so it was very noisy. Everything from a little .22 handgun to a .44 Magnum (which is LOUD, people).
We finish shooting and Mom and Dad hop in their truck to leave. Jeremy wants to check the sites on his bow before we leave, so he has his bow out and is shooting at his practice target. We’re all chatting and suddenly one of us realizes there’s a SPIKE BUCK STANDING RIGHT BY US!!! Seriously, there was a nice big buck standing about 15-20 yards away just staring at us.
So I say, “Holy sh*t, there’s one right there!” You know, just to make sure everyone else saw it too and knew that they should be excited. So everybody looks. The deer is still standing there, still staring at us. Jeremy had his bow drawn, ready to shoot again at the target – so he swung toward the deer. The deer is still standing there, still staring at us. I think Jonas, Shaina and I all said something along the line of “SHOOT IT!” And the deer is still standing there, still staring at us. But there was some brush between himself and the deer, so he stepped toward it to clear his line of sight. And it took off. Now I can tell you, I think he’s going to regret that decision for the rest of his life.
However, that being said… hunting is easy. You don’t have to wear camo, you don’t have to be quiet. You don’t have to get up at 4:30 in the morning – this was 1:30 in the afternoon! You don’t have to wash with No Scent – I had on Ralph Lauren’s Hot perfume (you guys out there might wanna try that instead). You don’t have to be patient or even go looking for them – they’ll come to you! It’s so easy.
I’d already decided that I was going to try my hand at hunting next year. I thought I was going to have to wear ugly camo and get up early. Turns out you don’t have to do any of that. As a matter of fact I’ve been hunting for years and didn’t even know it!
2 comments:
Yeap, Heather, that pretty much described the weekend! We loved having the 4 of you. However, I do have to speak up for Jeremy. He was not prepared to shoot a deer with the particular arrow he had in his bow. He judged the situation and elected not to shoot at that time. There was a great probability he would, at the least, lose an arrow. At worst, the deer would have been injured, but not mortally. He is a skilled and conscientious hunter. SO BACK OFF!
That being said, pretty much everything else you said, I agree with. I can sit on the deck with my morning coffee, still in my PJs, not smelling like plants and animals,Today Show in the background, and (if so inclined) shoot a deer eating beneath the bird feeder. No muss, no fuss, get the tractor and loader and lift it to field dress with my sharpest butcher knife. Wash it out with the garden hose, check it in online and go with Louis to take it to his niece's for processing. No Biggee! And I wouldn't even have to mess up my manicure!
Love ya, Mom
I always knew you liked him best!
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